1. Skip to navigation
  2. Skip to content
  3. Skip to sidebar

Justine Swartz

Brooklyn, Brooklyn Heights

You Are a Real NY’er When:

It says so on your birth certificate.


  • Quote Title: HUNGRY EYES

       “There were an an abundance of pizza places.
    I Was Starving. A lady walked by with a pizza box, noticed my eyes were drooling! She stopped, smiled, and gave me the first slice.”     

  • Scene Title: RATS

           The grounds of the beautiful Unitarian Church are infested with rats. The superintendent was dragging to the curb, containers filled with black plastic garbage bags. As he lifted one of them a huge footlong rat jumped out and ran by my feet accompanied by my glass-shattering screams. The Super laughed and quips, ” Watch, there will be another one.” Damn, if he wasn’t right!  I’ve seen an eclectic collection of caged rats in zoos; but I have Never seen such well fed athletic plump rats as those scampering about. 

  • Scene Title: oooooooo OOOOOOOOOO

          Snow was forecast at high noon when the light and airy snowflakes began. Scarcely ten minutes later the flakes were a fat mouthful,
    Nectar of the Gods


     Since November I have been giving out X’mas gifts. I thought I would like a X’mas gift. Today, as I was walking to the bank, around the corner tumbling in the wind were two twenty dollar bills. I threw my swim-bag on one and smashed the other to the ground with my foot. Retracing my steps, I scanned the people on Montague Street, just in case there was an unhappy person looking for the money. No! Business as usual on the street. So I pocketed my gift from God. Yea! I also looked for some more money, blowing in the wind, but that was it. 

  • Quote Title: YUMMY

    I was eating a salad, while watching TV and noticed I had a fork in each hand. I continued to eat with double enjoyment.

Bad Behavior has blocked 779 access attempts in the last 7 days.